How to Build Real Connections (Not Just Contacts)

In today’s hyper-connected world, networking often feels like a transactional exchange of business cards or LinkedIn messages. But real networking is so much more—it’s about building genuine relationships, not just adding to your contact list. Let’s reframe networking into something more meaningful: fostering authentic connections that enrich both your personal and professional life.

Demystifying Networking: Relationships, Not Transactions

Networking doesn’t have to feel forced or intimidating. At its core, it’s about connecting with others on a human level. Instead of focusing on what someone can do for you, shift your perspective: How can you build a meaningful relationship based on mutual respect, shared interests, or simply curiosity?

People remember authenticity. They respond to genuine interest and kindness, not cookie-cutter messages or transactional requests. The key to successful networking lies in being yourself and finding ways to connect naturally.

Practical Conversation Starters to Spark Real Connections

Starting a conversation doesn’t have to be awkward. Here are a few practical, authentic ways to break the ice:

01

Compliment their recent work or achievements:

Everyone appreciates being recognized for their hard work. For example:

“I saw your recent article on [topic], and I found it so insightful. How did you come up with that approach.”

02

Ask for their advice on a shared interest or challenge:

Seek their perspective on
something you’re genuinely curious about.

“I noticed you’ve navigated [specific challenge] in your career. What advice would you give to someone starting out?”

03

Share a personal interest or career goal:

By opening up, you invite them to connect with
you on a more personal level.

“I’m really passionate about [field/interest], and I’ve been exploring ways to grow in this area. What inspired you to pursue your path?”

These conversation starters help establish a foundation of respect and authenticity, making the interaction memorable and meaningful.

A Relatable Outreach Example

If you’re reaching out to someone for the first time, keep your message genuine and concise. Here’s an example:

“Hi [Name], I saw your [post/project] and was inspired by it! I’m just starting my career in [field] and would love to hear about your journey. Your perspective would mean a lot to me as I navigate the next steps in my path.”

Notice how this message is both specific and sincere. It recognizes the person’s work, expresses genuine interest, and provides a reason for the outreach without being overly formal or robotic.

Beginner Tip: Curiosity and Honesty Go a Long Way

One of the best pieces of advice for building connections is simple: Be curious and honest. People can sense when you’re being authentic, and they appreciate it more than you might realize. It’s okay to admit when you’re new to something or to ask questions about their journey—vulnerability can be a bridge to trust and understanding.

Ready to Start Connecting?

Building real relationships takes time and effort, but the rewards are worth it. To help you get started, we’ve created a Networking Script Cheat Sheet packed with ideas and examples to make reaching out easier.

Remember: Authenticity over everything. When you show up as your true self, you’ll not only build better connections—you’ll create lasting ones.

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